Am "I" To Blame? 

How Owning Your Actions Builds Character, Confidence, and a Brighter You

Hey Doll!

Have you ever thought about why sometimes what seems like the easiest thing to do is actually the hardest? Like saying "I'm sorry," being honest, or admitting when you’re wrong? You know what the right thing is, and yet, you take a different route. It happens to all of us. Let’s talk about why that is and what you can do about it.

There are certain words that come to mind when we talk about doing what’s right: accountability, truth, apology, ownership, respect, and dependability. These words are the foundation of character. They aren’t just words grownups throw around; they’re life tools that help shape who you are and who you're becoming.

But let’s get real. One of the biggest roadblocks to doing the right thing is pride. Good ol’ pride. And we’re not talking about the kind of pride you feel when you ace your science test or clean your room without being asked. That kind of pride is healthy and motivating. The pride that causes problems is the kind that makes you feel too embarrassed to admit you were wrong or too stubborn to say you're sorry. This kind of pride gets in the way of doing what’s right.

It’s called hubristic pride, and it can make things harder than they need to be. It’s the kind of pride that says, "I’d rather lose a friend than admit I messed up," or "I’m not going to apologize first." Sound familiar? If so, don’t worry, you’re not alone. We all battle with this from time to time. The key is learning how to choose the right kind of pride and knowing when to let the wrong kind go.

So, how do we make those tough but right choices? Let’s break it down:

1. Be Accountable: Taking responsibility for your actions means not making excuses or blaming others. If you hurt someone’s feelings, own up to it. Even if you didn’t mean to, recognizing your role helps you grow and shows others you’re trustworthy.

2. Be Honest (with yourself and others): Honesty isn’t always easy, especially when telling the truth might get you into trouble. But truth builds trust, and people respect those who are brave enough to be real. Whether it's admitting you forgot a chore or you weren't completely truthful with a friend, honesty paves the way for stronger relationships.

3. Take Ownership: It’s tempting to say, “It wasn’t my fault.” But taking ownership doesn’t mean taking the blame for everything—it means recognizing your part and learning from it. That’s how we grow. Imagine how much stronger you’ll be when you face things head-on instead of running from them.

4. Make It Right: When you’ve wronged someone, a simple "I’m sorry" can go a long way. Apologies don’t make you weak; they make you courageous. Saying sorry shows that you care about others and that their feelings matter to you.

5. Treat Others with Respect: This one’s a biggie. Respect isn’t just for teachers or parents—it’s for everyone, including yourself. That means speaking kindly, listening when others talk, and showing appreciation. When you show respect, it reflects your values and sets the tone for how others should treat you too.

6. Keep Your Word: If you say you’re going to do something, follow through. Being dependable is a trait people admire and remember. Whether it’s turning in your homework, helping with chores, or being there for a friend, doing what you say builds your character.

And here’s the secret sauce to all of it: treat others the way you want to be treated.

We’ve all heard it, but it really works. If you mess up, think about how you’d want someone else to act if the roles were reversed. Wouldn’t it feel great if they apologized? Or tried to make it right? That’s your clue.

In life, you won’t be judged by how others treated you, but by how you treated others. That’s powerful stuff. Being a role model doesn’t mean being perfect. It means showing others what it looks like to learn, grow, and do better each day.

Let’s also talk about how this all connects to self-love and empowerment. Being able to admit your mistakes and correct them isn’t just about making others happy, it’s about respecting yourself enough to be real. When you live with honesty and integrity, you attract people who value those same things. And when you value yourself, everything changes.

At Hey Doll!, we believe in helping you build that confidence and character one small step at a time. That’s why our monthly self-care box for girls is filled with thoughtful goodies, uplifting messages, and confidence-building activities for tweens. It’s a little reminder that growth is a journey, not a race.

Each curated gift box for 10 to 13 year olds includes tools to help you reflect, stay organized, and express who you are with pride (the good kind). Whether it’s a cute journal to write your thoughts, self-care items to pamper yourself, or keepsakes that encourage kindness, everything inside is meant to support your journey to becoming your best self.

It’s more than a subscription, it’s a celebration of YOU. That’s why so many parents choose our teen girl empowerment gifts as a unique birthday gift idea for teen girls who are figuring it all out, just like you. You’re not alone, and you’re not expected to be perfect. You’re simply expected to try your best, learn from your mistakes, and keep shining.

So next time you find yourself asking, "Am I to blame?" remember this: accountability isn’t about shame. It’s about strength. It’s not about guilt. It’s about growth. And it’s not about being right. It’s about being real.

You’ve got everything you need to rise above the tough moments and become the person you’re proud to be. And guess what? We’re here to cheer you on every step of the way.

Stay honest. Stay true. Stay you.

It really is that simple! #HeyDollstrong